Cluster: Reconciliation

 René's Highlights  Edith's Highlights
Video 6 Question 6, Day 1, Berlin, 0000-0223
Topic: Archive - Continuation of Video 005

0:00
I can’t really use my mother altogether.. you know, I mean I was busy running around doing teaching and, you know, being my kind of gipsy-self. And these things were just stored in a box and I didn’t think anybody was really interested in, you know, it was not a big deal. And then, about 20, yes 20 years ago when William Rand started to do his research, he just really… all my little walls of resistance came up and I… I sort of ignored all this stuff that I had because I didn’t know what I would find and I was afraid of what I would find, I think, you know in all this stuff… or what I wouldn’t find, you know it’s kind it goes both ways.
0:56
So… then, you know I met Justin probably 4 years ago now and I also before him met 3 or 4 other people who were doing research in Reiki and then.. Rick Bockner and I started to these weekends of telling stories about Hawayo Takata and her teaching and so on. And I did bring out some of the nice pieces of this archive for people to see. And I think almost 10 years ago now, we had a Reiki Alliance conference in Idaho and I had all this stuff and I thought «well, actually just make a room or like an archive, like a little museum of this stuff from my grandmother», which I did. And people really loved it, they respected it and.. it was my first opening actually and all this other stuff has come. So I’ve gradually become more willing to be more open with it and I think the door really opened when my mother died, because it was… I didn’t have familial retribution, then..
2:23

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2. Cluster: Mutters Einfluss
Hier zeigt sich wie William Rand ein Dorn in ihrem Auge war und sie heute beginnt, sich zu öffnen - ganz im Sinne der Versöhnung.

RV Editing: 09-1
make one video out of V006 and V005
Video 7 Question 7, Day 1, Berlin, 0000-0151
Topic: "Teaching Story" versus historic facts

0:00
…
0:17
ok… this is just an aside, but unfortunately there was actually a panel in Erfurt at this conference about this very thing and I couldn’t go to it because it coincided with Justin’s presentation. It was really maddening…
0:44
So… when.. in 1979 when I travelled with my grandmother, I first heard the story of Reiki, I just thought «… it’s only unbelievable». And.. because you know I had no experience of Reiki, I didn’t even know what Reiki was really, as far as to practice or the energy or anything. And I had to use other people as a kind of test to see whether my grandmother was like really crazy or if she was actually saying something that was a value to people. But people sat and listened to her and they were respectable people and you know, it’s like.. I just finally had to surrender to.. that she was saying things to people that I couldn’t relay to but these other people did, I mean, they were awestruck by this whole thing.
1:51

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Das Spannungsfeld zwischen Takata (der Mutter) und Phyllis zeigt sich. Und dass Phyllis zu Reiki so wie die Jungfrau zum Kinde kam.

RV Editing: 10-1
delete first 44 seconds (kursiv)
Video 7 Question 7, Day 1, Berlin, 0151-0459

1:51
As I grew to have more relationship with Reiki and to start teaching it and to recount the story myself, what I realized was that there was a transmission of energy that was happening through the story, that I had no control over, like it just happened and I wasn’t consciously making it happen, it just happened. So, one of the odd things about the story of course is that (0225) Hayashi.. no, Haw.. ähm.. (0227) Usui’s story and Hayashi’s story pretty much remain the same as my grandmother told it. But when I came to my grandmother I knew like way too much information. So I had to start sorting out which information I actually told in classes, which became a part of the story and then what about me? (0251) Right? …
2:53 coughs
(0257) So, then Paul and I started to do these Masters intensives together in 1993. And when we came to telling the story, I would tell the first part of the story and then he would tell the last part of the story. And so it was interesting to listen to him and see what he left out and what he said and so on. And what we realized was that information does not carry energy as well as story. So we left out the date she was born and we left out you know, all this stuff and just talked about “when she met Reiki”. (0340)
3:42
So then (cough) god.. (0347) so then I had this insight that, (0350) ähm (pauses) (0358) it was not the story of four people but it was a story of Reiki and how it emerged through these people’s lives. Which was a good perspective for me because it really helped me when people started to add birthdays and you know, when people died and all this factual stuff… but it’s not about people. It’s about Reiki. So that helped some people.
4:26
And then…when the memorial stone was found was a really big thing, because that was the first real kind of substantial body of information, and lo and behold, what was on the stone collaborated my grandmother’s story. Well that was like «shuuu» relieve!
4:59

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2. Cluster: Reconciiation.
Phyllis zeigt Wertschätzung gegenüber Petter's Arbeit.

Video 8 Question 8, Day 1, Berlin, 0000-0308
Topic: Healing of individual and society (in and with Germany)

0:00
When I first started to teach Reiki and then started to travel around to meet groups of Reiki people, we were very much involved in personal healing, like how did Reiki affect people and how did Reiki affect the individual. When I first came to Germany however, I was really struck by the profundity of what happened in Reiki classes here. Brigitte Müller was the woman that I initiated and she was the first Reiki master who practiced here in Germany… And when I went to her class, which was about 17 to 20 people (1:07) (coughing) I found people weeping and going through some kind of cathartic experiences. And I didn’t understand German at the time. So I didn’t know what they were saying. But afterwards Brigitte said, well this happens all the time in classes, and it happened immediately when Mary McFayden came and started to teach. She was the master from Hawayo Takata, who came and taught in Germany and… was the mother of Reiki here in Germany, as far as I’m concerned.
1:58
And what was happening with people, is that they would say «Oh, I haven’t cried for 40 years» or «I haven’t thought of the war 20 years», and… or «I haven’t..», you know they were taken back to a time when their emotions were sort of stopped and held.. you know, kind of hold. And it seemed that Reiki pressed the hold button or the pause button and then they could feel their emotions again. And in doing that, it really felt that they were healing individually their own confusion and fear and shame and guilt about whatever happened around them during World War II. If a significant number of individuals have this experience in one part of the earth that I feel like there is an energy shift, you know, in that country.
3:08

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Versöhnung auf der grossen Bühne: nach dem Krieg. Eine Vorstellung herrscht, dass Reiki dazu beigetragen hat, dass die Berliner Mauer runter gekommen ist. Das möchte ich so nicht in diesem Video erzählen. Aber wie Fremde Ihre Deutschablehnung loslassen, das ja.

RV Editing: 11-1
Emotional, Phyllis weeping. Strong statement that reconciliation is possible. Within individuals and within society.
Video 8 Question 8, Day 1, Berlin, 0308-0558

3:08
And then what was also happening is that when I came to Germany a couple of years later, I met a woman near Hamburg, who was a very excited Reiki student and she decided to buy a house in the country and have a Reiki center, where we could do workshops. So I was really in the middle of doing workshops and decided to have one at her house. And I really liked being there. So I decided to make a kind of my place to land and then I would just teach from there and do these different master candidate classes and so on. And I was having people come from the Netherlands and France and Belgium and the Scandinavian countries and so on to this place near Hamburg. And almost immediately what I heard form them was «well, it was really difficult for me to come here”. And I went, being an American: «why?». And they would say: «Well, I swore I would never come to Germany again in my life after the war». And this happened so many times and so many different memories and painful experiences came up with their being here in Germany, but… and then there was the other side of it: So there is this guy who came to my workshops, and he really, I mean, looked like a Gestapo officer, you know the stereo-type kind of guy, and I just.. his name is Hans. And then he said «Well, I’m a citizen of the world, I’m not German». And I said «Hans, you’re really German and if you don’t own this Germaneness then you’ll never be able to use it in a way that heals people”. So he found that was pretty weird. I actually thought it was a pretty weird thing to say, but I didn’t know what else to say, it was true. And after a few years of this, people started to come back and one of these Dutch guys who really touched me, he was big truck-driver kind of guy, you know, not very well educated and he had been driving all through Europe all these years. He said «You know, every time I came through Germany he just said ‚okay, don’t stop, don’t break down, I don’t wanna speak the German language, you know, I’m not into Germany». And he said: «You know what happened? … When I came this time I thought I’m coming home”…
5:58

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Phyllis is weeping 05:58
Video 8 Question 8, Day 1, Berlin, 0558-0813

5:58
..and it just so touched me because there was obviously a healing, you know, that went far beyond the individual to this society that just had so much pain that they didn’t know what to do with it and that reiki was coming in and it could be expressed and it could be dissipated. I mean, you know, the memories will never go away and you know, if you think about it the pain comes back but there is some understanding also of the humanity of everybody that was involved. And I found that to be really profound. And it’s happened in many other places in the world… And I also believe that in every country where Reiki has profoundly been practiced, which is now pretty much every country in the world, even Africa, that there is something shifting in the society. And the people in the east, in East Berlin, who took Reiki, found that it was kind of a 100th monkey-thing that happened that the amount of Reiki that was started to be practiced in East Berlin and in East Germany rose to a level and actually contributed in opening the wall. And I have no idea if that’s true and at the time I just went «oh, forget it». But now that I see the profundity, you know, in the past of these kinds of experiences, I realize that it’s really very possible, that something shifted in the holding of this society that really allowed the Wall to come down and didn’t need to be there to demonstrate the separateness of people. So there’s that part of how Reiki has affected societies and cultures where it’s gone into.
8:13
And now I need a Kleenex…

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this entire video is a video in its own right.
Video 15 Question 15, Day 2, Berlin, 0000-0250
Topic: Betrayals

0:00
Well I think the first ….again
0:11
I feel that the largest sort of betrayal or injustice in my life was definitely not understanding the point of my going on this trip with my grandmother 1979. And that.. I mean people laugh and I think the think I’m joking, you know, the difference between, you know, a person who decided to quit everything and become a ski bum, because skiing really transformed my life on a physical level as well as lots of other levels . And then I went off in the summer to travel with my grandmother, a person that I didn’t really like, and I was really uncomfortable, we’ve had a really painful relationship with and at the same time I feel that somehow underneath it, Reiki was calling me, but I could only say that 20 years later, I couldn’t have said that at the time.
01:29
And I really did think that I was going with her to carry her suitcases, make sure she didn’t get robbed or carry the money anyway and make sure she ate well. So… much to my surprise it ended up to be the initiation as a master and my first teaching on how to teach classes and so on. And my first understanding about what Reiki was for her. So, I felt betrayed by my mother who encouraged me to go on this trip, never saying “Well you know, if you go, you’re going to, you know, working with your grandmother and so on”. And then, when my grandmother initiated me, you know, and I heard this kind of funny like clapping-hand-noise, and she says “And now you can work with me”, you know, I really did have this picture of carrying suitcases, counting money and I never.. I never imagined teaching Reiki, because up to that time I didn’t even know what Reiki was. So….
02:50

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2. Cluster: Phyllis
Difficult relationship with Takata, betrayed by mother, transformation and Calling, Skiing ... also in V082

Barbara Weber ..
RV Editing: 01-2
Video 15 Question 15, Day 2, Berlin, 0516-0750

5:15
But what I realized then, was that I… it was like a kind of apprenticeship. I really lived with my grandmother, I found out what Reiki was in daily life. And I met some students of hers, that I really liked. And I thought “well, these people are not so weird, so probably this is ok”. And then I spent the next months sort of trying to figure out who I was in all of this. And then the next thing was that… I just decided that I had to spend the next summer by myself and go on this trip.
6:00
And that trip was a series of minor and major miracles that really allowed me to have some perspective of what had happened with me. And on the drive back home to Colorado, I realized that the question was not “Am I going to commit my life?” because I realized I already had done that and that Reiki was dictating, I would say at that point, what I was doing with my life and that I had already been committed from the moment that I was initiated as a master. So that was a revelation to me (laugh) it was amazing!..
6:58
And then my grandmother died. That I felt was a betrayal, because she had told me that she would live until Christmas, that she would for sure be there for Christmas. And she died on December 11th I was really angry for a month or something because I felt that she had not kept her promise and that I would have done something really different if I had known that. But whenever I thought that I would always hear her words say “Reiki comes first” and then I would get even more angry because for me family duty was really the most important thing in my life at that point.
7:50

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Video 15 Question 15, Day 2, Berlin, 0750-1033

7:50
A few month after my grandmother’s death Barbara Weber declared herself to be the successor, or tried to. And people … the other masters that Hawayo Takata had initiated called me up and said “well I recognise you as a successor, now what are you going to do?” . And I went “Well, I don’t know”… and I went to visit Barbara Weber to see if she would do this in tandem with me, I felt like she was very organised person, which I was not at the time. She knew how to market Reiki. And I found it a little abhorrent to market Reiki, so I didn’t like it. But I thought well maybe that’s ok, maybe she can do that and I can do this other thing, called “essence” . But I had no idea what that was actually. And she turned me down. I think it was a wise thing for her, it was all or nothing. And I feel it was also wise for me, I just didn’t know that. And then she started to…. and then she started to publish her Newsletter, saying she was the only true master that Hawayo Takata had initiated and so on.
9:20
So another betrayal came about, but very quickly I realized it was the greatest gift my grandmother had left me, because if somebody had not challenged all of us, at once, then we would not have found this place in ourselves that was very clearly a master and knew that we were masters and that we were able to… go to that place of mastery and out of that place develop ourselves as masters. So she gave us a great gift, it was a very contrary gift, and at sometimes very painful because we all wanted it to be love and light and cooperation and everything. But, you know, I had lived most of my life through adversity, so (Laughs) .. it seemed pretty OK for me.
10:34

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2. Cluster: Original 22 and Master Body

this passage here is interrupted ... but she crecounts the same episode and comments on Barbra Weber in Video 32, 33 and 67, 68, 80, 82
Video 16 Question 16, Day 2, Berlin, 0302-0616

3:01
Sometime in the mid 80ies I remember realizing that I had lived a lot of my life at the mercy of other people and what they thought and my mother kept pointing this out to me but I had no idea what she meant at the time (laugh) what she was talking to me. But I realized that as a master and as a lineage bearer, as grand master if I didn’t feel a complete Yes in everything that I did, then I wouldn’t do it. That was my motto. And I still use that to this day. I don’t have to have reasons for it to be a Yes, because often there are no reasons. Because it looks like on the outside that I shouldn’t do it, but on the inside, if I say Yes, then I just do it. And my thinking is that.. if I make a decision for a Yes then I can always make another decision later because I didn’t… I can’t blame anybody else, because I can’t say “oh well, that René he told me do this and then, you know, well he shouldn’t have told me that and now so I am in this hot water “. And if you do it yourself , then you can always make another decision. And it’s really OK for me to go: “Whoops, I thought this was the road I wanted to take, and it isn’t”. So I’m backing up, I’m turning around … or I’m taking a detour or something else.
4:50 (räusper)
I also learned that what people bring to me as a reflection of who I am at the time … and I see that I am also a very reflective person back. So if somebody comes to me with a kind of attitude , then watch out, because I can just turn into that attitude so fast, it’s a little scary for me actually.
5:25
I have a few relationships in my life, where … it will always be a contrary kind of relationship but in that contrariness there is … there is a deep and abiding faith of care in that relationship, and that the safety is there to be contrary and to be aggressive sometimes, to be myself if I need to be and to reflect back to the other person who they are. Not.. I don’t do this consciously, I don’t think “oh, I’m.. now I’m gonna be reflective” . But it’s just something that happens inside of me. 0610 And ähm .. So (räusper)
6:15

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2. Cluster: Phyllis

Video 18 Question 18, Day 2, Berlin, 0000-0148
Topic: Do you think a RM needs a therapist ?

0:00
(René: ..you agree with that?) Yes, I do… 0007 I feel that we are in a very interesting position as Reiki masters. I don’t know the daily things about people very often. I don’t know if they are married or if they have a relationship, I don’t know if they have children, I certainly don’t know the names of most of their children, I don’t know where they live, I don’t know what their daytime job is if they happen to have one. I only know a few little details that come up in coversation and I don’t hold on to them very much because it would be impossible.
0:52
But, eg. for my 1st degree students when they sit in the chair for initiation, they open themselves to me totally energetically. And that is a truly amazing intimate moment that will never ever be shared by anybody else. So that responsibility, that moment of initiation brings me to, I believe, to an energetic and spiritual connection with this person for a life time and perhaps we’re renewing something from other lifetimes, I have no idea, I have my own theories about that.
1:48

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2. Cluster: Mastery
Projections Student-Master, oral tradition, family constellation

RV Editing: 04-2
Video 18 Question 18, Day 2, Berlin, 0615-0838

6:15
And some people walk and so on. So it’s… it’s an interesting process, but it’s important that this particular activity be conscious because if its not conscious and you have your own process remain in an unconscious state, then…. you will for sure involve your students and people around you into your drama and then to extract yourself is really difficult. I know because I have been there.
6:51
The woman that I was talking about … in my early Reiki life was part of a drama that I have created and that my husband and I have created. And I could totally understand her feeling so unsafe, that she just couldn’t be with me at all. And … and jet I really trust her teaching of Reiki, I trust … I know that she is dedicated to Reiki and dedicated the rest of her life to Reiki. So in that way, you know, it comes to this kind of question about success. It’s like…. was I successful as a Master? Well, yes, I was, but I wasn’t very successful as a friend and I wasn’t very successful in my own inner family relationships where she got swept up into it. And then…there.. at this point there is really no way to go back and extract ourselves from that and it happened. And sometimes there irrevocable… there is irrevocable damage that happened. And it’s good to accept that so and not have to… you know..lessen your own guilt by making it OK for you. But I think for her it will never be OK. And that is sad but it is true. And I hope that there are not very many people in my Reiki life where I have created that kind of situation.
8:38

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eine erste Entschuldigung.

from 6:51 onwards she refers to the woman in Video 13 and 14 .. here she as much as apologizes.
Video 19 Question 19, Day 2, Berlin, 0000-0228
Topic: Reconcilliation, forgiveness

0:00
Well, it took me a while to 0010 (räusper) it took me a while to come to an understanding of forgiveness. Because what I did instead, was I just took the responsibility on myself. And so my hardest thing was to learn how to forgive myself. And it was one of the things that we… I believe inadvertently touched upon in our self-assessment workshops. And there was some amazing times when people would … we would do roleplay or we would do communication exercises and somehow it would touch somebody so deeply that they would be catapulted into the process of forgiveness, much to their surprise I think and ours as well.
1:12
And for me …I found that forgiveness was a kind of miracle that happened when a certain set of circumstances occurred all at the same moment. And then somehow there was this revelationary occurrence and then forgiveness began to work….
1:44
So I have spent a lot of time in my therapy sessions trying to divest myself from the responsibility for everything that happened in the world, in my world especially. And to be able to forgive myself for being human, I mean that was one of my first things, is to know well you’ve made mistakes. Well, no I haven’t! I haven’t made mistakes and I am responsible for this and I’m in fault and …. So that was my line. And to get over that line
0216 (räusper)
and to come to a place of being able to forgive was really a major piece of work for me.
2:28

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RV Editing: 05-2
Video 19 Question 19, Day 2, Berlin, 0406-0552

4:06
But I never imagined that, so to hear these people converse together and to say “Well, I always wanted this from you.” And the other person saying “But I couldn’t have given you that, that you had to find for yourself.” And then the energy of forgiveness and reconciliation coming in that same moment was astonishing, it was very moving for me and allowed me… I think they came at a time when it allowed me to divest myself of last ideas that as a lineage bearer I had to be perfect.
5:00
I knew my grandmother wasn’t perfect, for sure. And ..it was always my big paradox or my big….dilemma of how to hold my grandmother as the woman that I knew she was and my experience of her as a granddaughter as another person of the planet and as a Reiki Master 0526 knowing she was not hum… ähm 0528 knowing she was not perfect and yet hearing how.. she was so perfect for everybody else. So that was an interesting play in itself in this constellation. So I found it to be… I find it to be very interesting and it’s something actually that I’m still working on…0550 to get clear about
5:52

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Video 22 Question 22, Day 2, Berlin, 0646-0938

06:46
So we ended up in this very small town in the south-east corner of Iowa. That’s where I went to school all my years of … in the United States Grade School, so from 5-18. And basically I saw my life as being really terrible. My Brother was born almost 5 years after I was, so I was almost 5. I had been an only child, very pampered and very dotted on for 5 years and then, all of a sudden, the son comes. In Japanese families, sons are very important. And he was also a premature baby. So he got lots of attention. And I felt totally not cared for at all.  And then a couple of years later my sister came, so very close together. Actually, they’re.. I think they are an year and a half apart.
07:54
So, it was kind of .. one thing over another thing. And then in school – because this was right after the war – people were not happy with having a Japanese child in school. And the teachers were extremely weird. Mostly, the prejudice and they kind of hateful experience I had in school were from teachers. They would… the kids would tease me about being Japanese and I would, of course, fight for my self. And … I was the one that got her mouth washed out with soap. Or, y’know, got to stand in a corner. Or.. and the other kids never had any kind of retribution from the teachers.
08:49
It was only when I was 64, if you can imagine, and found out that I had a metastasis from my breast cancer.And so that my girl friends from this time, I’ve met them when I was 4 when I moved to Keosauqua, three of them came and we talked about my relationship with my mother which was very fraught and my family life back in those days and who they saw I was during that time. And it was a revelation, really, I mean, this was really true reconciliation. 0934 OK, I’m gonna take a little brake here..0937
09:42

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2. Cluster: Reconciliation

Video 32 Question 32, Day 2, Berlin, 1257-1453

12:57
This phrase “the spiritual lineage” came in the second meeting at Barbara Brown’s house when we were trying to put together statements of identity for this Reiki Alliance. And I still believe that these statements have great foresight and also a great challenge. I can’t say them right off hand but one of them says something like… “we recognize all masters as equal in the oneness of Reiki” and the Reiki Alliance members today still argue about this phrase. But I believe that all masters of Reiki are equal in the oneness of Reiki. It doesn’t mean we are the same and it’s very important for me…it was very important for me that this thought was a founding stone, a corner stone of the Reiki Alliance because I didn’t want anyone to feel that this Reiki Alliance was a like an exclusive club. But actually my fear became realized and when the new form started to appear in the mid 1980ies or actually in the late 1980ies the Reiki Alliance rally closed it’s door and became very specific to the practice that was passed on from Hawayo Takata to her masters. And that was fine for me but I also wanted them to realize that “they weren’t better than” and this is something that is still in discussion in the Reiki Alliance today.
14:53

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Video 33 Question 33, Day 2, Berlin, 0408-0515

4:08
And that there is this… time frame now where Reiki has appeared and allowed us to develop into masters, like it’s kind of a self-taught masters’ course… in some way, with the help of Reiki, the energy. So… in that sense I don’t see… well, in that sense I believe that if we are truly masters, we’ll be able to understand that particular statement and actually support it, because I believe that it’s true. It’s a piece of wisdom that we came up with that was way beyond actually our mental consciousness at the time. (0501) That’s what I feel….
(René: beyond the individual’s comprehension?)
Yah, but (0508) we all agreed to it so somehow I think we were wise beyond our years, so to speak.
5:15

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Video 44 Question 44, Day 2, Berlin, 0000-0747
Topic: Trademark, Controlling alterations to system - Continuation of Videos 40-43

00:00
Well, it’s very hard to generalize why people are angry and specially around this. And as I said a lot of it has to do with peoples‘ misunderstanding about the use of trademarks and what the bring you. The other thing is that, you know, when we adapt a practice like Reiki that touches us in this kind of essence place of our humanness, then we want to protect it, to control it in the sense of, you know, making sure it’s not harmed, to be sure that other people don’t harm it themselves. We don’t want it taken away from us. We don’t like betrayal. And so … depending on your own attitude about what those controls must be
01:02
or how want’em protected or how … I should have done my job to protect it then of course there … I can understand why there would be a lot of anam… anger and animosity because I just didn’t do my job. I mean, that was Joop’s .. as far as I received from his communication at the time, his bottom line, was that I wasn’t doing my job so that he had to do it for me. And now that he was doing my job I ended up appearing taking it away from him. And.. you know, I can see that. However, people assume that there was a way to control the proliferation of the different of the different forms of practice. And I believe there was absolutely no way to control that.
02:02
I mean, this started happening from the moment Hawayo Takata died or before. And I liken it to our human need to make things our own. So as a kin.. as an example which seems kind of flip
02:24-02:30 (coughing)
it seems kind of flip but actually, I think we all can relate to it, as we go into a hotel room that is made to be neutral and immediately we open our bag, we take out our stuff. I used to have a whole hotel room thing. I’d always have a pareo or a beach shawl, Sarong kind of thing, I put it over the TV. And then I’d have the pictures of the masters, I’d put them up. Have a little candle, put my stuff in the bathroom, scatter it around, take the towels down and fold them the way I want it. You know, I’d undo the bed because I hate having the bed tucked in at the bottom.
03:16

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2. Cluster: ... Master Body
Auch die Dissonanz begann schon vor Takata, Barbara Weber und deshalb Cluster Reconciliation.

Video 49 Question 2, Day 2, Arizona, 0000-0156
Topic: Reiki Home: reconciliation styles and Nature - Continuation ov Video 48

0:00
Oh I’m sorry I didn’t make that clear… (0009)  We are incorporating or inviting or visioning that this will be a reconciliation place for all Reiki practices to come together. Not, as I said, not to teach each other our practices, not to convince each other who is right or wrong but to live in peace, to rally live supporting each other because I believe that.. what humanity is asking for is a way to get in touch with our human spirit and to be able to nurse that spirit just in a very simple way like we do with Reiki, our Reiki practice.
0:54
And if we spend our time arguing about hand positions and you know personalities and so on it’s really a sad waste of an opportunity to develop humanity in its sense, to deepen our Reiki practice. And you know having different forms and having different ideas about
0123 (räusper) 
where Reiki, the energy comes from and you know should we have oral tradition and have a master who stands in front and in person and initiates or is it okay to accept you know distant initiations and so on. All these questions, they really are the meat for some great conversations, not about finding out who’s right or wrong but to deepen our understanding of the universe and these questions Reiki is leading us to
2:01

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V049 needs to be added to V048
Cannon MVI 5117 (?)
Video 49 Question 2, Day 2, Arizona, 0156-0258

2:01
And I believe that this is what Takata said when she said “let Reiki teach you”. She didn’t say “go practice Reiki however you want to”. She said “let Reiki teach you” and one of the things that I learned about Reiki is that when you get a question that’s the great learning, that’s the place where you get to go deeply and sometimes it takes you years to find the answer. And I believe if we all came together and connected and discussed these questions we would further our own individual practices, our own individual understanding of the universe and raise the practice of Reiki in the world to… a recognized force in our social transformation.
2:58

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Video 56 Question 9, Day 2, Arizona, 0000-0225
Topic: Men vs Women? - Continuation of Video 055

0:00
So, if we could generalize and say that this informational truth was sort of masculine and the feminine truth was from feeling then there would be a wish for me to bring these two together and it’t kind on my bucket list of things to do before I die that somehow these two will come together peacefully, not in competition but in understanding that they actually complement one another. And this the thing that again is… always.. a little irritates me, because.. people write books or they want to save the Reiki community from another lie or whatever their motivation is and I think it’s too bad that… we don’t really want to serve the community and what I mean by that is not to be so egoistic about it, you know to feel like I’m going to save the world or I’m going to write the best so and so or whatever and all the research basically that has been done, where I ‘ve been able to see the actual facts have supported the story as I have gotten it, received it from Hawayo Takata.
1:44 ähm (räusper)
There are not very many… there have been one or two little things, where I’ve had to really think about “what did she really say?” and “did I use different words?” and “did I misunderstand this part?” and so on but for the most part it’s been totally supportive. …The publication of having the existence of the memorial stone in Tokyo..outside of Tokyo .. totally supports the story as it was told to me by Hawayo Takata.
2:25

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,
needs to be added to previous Video 055
Cannon MVI 5126 up to 5:05 from where the next question (Sacrifice?) starts for the next Video ie 057
Video 57 Question 10, Day 2, Arizona, 0000-0210
Topic: What would you still contribute to achieve peace amongst "factions"

0:00
Why would I have to make a sacrifice? If you ask me “what would I have to give?” that’s a totally different question (0016) (René: let me rephrase the question..laughter…Thank you … and the answer would be?) (0028)
0:29
Well… first of all I feel like I have to stay alive long enough for this to happen, because one can not push these things, these kinds of coming together. So I believe that this filming, I believe your conversations with all these Reiki Masters around world
(0058).
I believe that movements like the Australian Congress (for whatever better word)… I believe that Reiki Home as it matures will bring these factions together in a way that is the right time. And then when we meet it will be able to be done in a way that people will say “well, that wasn’t so difficult! Why did we think that this was impossible?”.
01:30
And this has happened over and over and over in my lifetime with Reiki. And so I don’t know why it can’t happen now. So I have to give up dying…. And probably other things in my personality that I can’t see right now. But I have to be able to make the space open for the conversation and I work on it myself.
02.10

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,

2. Cluster: ...Master Body

as a continuation of the Question about male/female (patriarchy)...
This will not be a video on its own ... only for the reconciliation Video.
Cannon MVI 5127
Video 58 Question 11, Day 2, Arizona, 0000-0110
Topic: Reconciliation with researchers

0:00
Certain people bring out certain qualities in us, you know, when we partner with them and it’s really interesting, you know, we always polarize. So you know the more macho the researchers are, you know, and now I feel like Frank Petter and William Rand and some of the others have softened a bit. I don’t know if that’s really true or not but it feels like they have. So I feel less defence, defended and so you know it’s like this is part of the process it’s going to take to have us come together not particularly in the sense of being in the same room talking together but being able to use their data and find it ok and then… you know what I mean (0054) So.. (René in the back ground) Oh no! This is not on the record (Thassos: this was on record) … I’m kiding, I dont care. (Thassos in the back ground). (0111)
1:10

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Hier erwähnt sie namentlich zwei ihrer Kontrahenten

as a continuation of the Question about male/female (patriarchy)...
This will not be a video on its own ... only for the reconciliation Video.
Cannon MVI 5133
Video 59 Question 12, Day 2, Arizona, 0000-0142
Topic: Would you go to a closed meeting with Rand, Petter, Ellyard?

0:00
Well there.. at this point I have to say that… I have to consider my physical health, so most likely not. But in the sense of an ideal situation, it wouldn’t work unless we had a higher purpose. We couldn’t just meet to meet because what’s the point? I don’t want to necessarily be friends with them, I don’t want to learn their…. form of Reiki. I don’t want to teach them my form of Reiki, I mean I’m not… that’s not an agenda item on my part. So the question is more to the point why would we meet, what would be the motivation for us to go and it would have to be something pretty astonishing, something… (0103) you know I’ve been studying ähm …
1:09
excuse me .. .(0113) I’ve been studying regenerative thinking and a part of this regenerative thinking is to acknowledge that in order to have transformational processes happen that we need to be able to think on three.. at least three levels and maybe more. And the three levels that are primary are the individual, this community.. our group-mind and then for us to have a higher purpose. So it’s a third line of work.
1:42

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Cannon MVI 5134
The question came vrom Esther and Ikechukwu with the suggestion to do it in Africa
Video 59 Question 12, Day 2, Arizona, 0142-0315

1:42
So, for instance, if individually we all worked on ourselves enough and were engaged enough to feel like we were able to go an meet each other… then the next line is what would we.. what would bring us together and it would have to be a third line of work, it would have to be something that all of us were passionate about and all of us were willing to come together to talk about this (points upwards), not here (points midway) and not our individual selves.
2:21
So, for instance, in ProReiki there is.. this organisation has in someway set a bar that’s a higher purpose, which is to explore… the possibility of making Reiki professional, which I am still on the borderland whether or not this is an appropriate mission, but it still is a mission but it brings us together so that I can be in a room or be in a meeting with people that I would never be in a meeting …. I mean I wouldn’t be there just flat. So that’s all I am saying is that we would have to have really interesting conversation at hand.
3:15

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Video 59 Question 12, Day 2, Arizona, 0315-0330

reconciliation is the force that brings us together. Just to be clear: I could do reconciliation without meeting them.

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this is on Cannon MVI 5134 (05:31-05:46) and not taken by Andi into this video. Please add.
Video 60 Question 13, Day 2, Arizona, 0334-0546

3:34
In Japan, because of the culture.. Japan introduced Buddhism to it’s… brought Buddhism in kind of the year 536 or something. And out of that time many different… sects like SECTS of Buddhism emerged. They basically all practiced Buddhism in the sense that they take the words that… were attributed to Buddha and the methods that he used to attain enlightenment, they have approximately the same identification of enlightenment what the term means, but they take only a small portion of his teaching and one method to get there. And that’s the difference of all these sects. But they all know that they.. their foundation is all the same practice. And I would love Reiki to become that way because it means that there is no competition, there is no right and wrong, just different forms and different methods to get to the same relationship with Reiki, the universal life energy.
5:04
So for instance in Zen meditation, which is Zen Buddhism, which is very… well we have some idea in the western world about Zen meditation, so it’s a very specific kind of meditation. And you basically sit in silence and you’re.. you sit doing chants of mantras and stuff to a certain amount of time and then your process is to have internal processes that bring you to enlightenment to peace within yourself. And it takes many, many years if not a lifetime.
5:46

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2. Cluster: Cultural Transfer

Video 60 Question 13, Day 2, Arizona, 0546-0843

5:46
For another sect of Buddhism, they believe that …. I can’t remember the name of the sect, but it’s a sect that actually created the Japanese written language from Chinese. And this man created a sect of Buddhism and they believe that language and the chanting of language, phrases is a way to enlightenment. So this one sect takes the heart sutra and this is their main chant and they say that if you have the heart sutra on your wall and say it every day then you will, your inner self will automatically become improved. It will be beneficial.

6:45
So here is one sect that says you’re supposed to chant and use language, the other sect doesn’t use language at all. But they don’t fight against each other. They just simply see that perhaps a student of one sect could go to the other because they advance and then they decide “oh, now I need to go and sit in silence” or the other way around. And the point is that they know that their service is to the student and his benefit. And this is the part where we in Reiki are not, we don’t have yet, we don’t serve the student, we decide that our practice needs to be big and important so that we can be big and important. And we are not paying any attention to the confusion and the disarray that this brings into a student. And so not only do they have to put up with that with their own disarray inside of themselves and their own spiritual practice and figuring out what’s going on, but then they have to figure out this whole other mess that is there.

7:59
And for me the mess is an adolescent stage of development, which is where we are. This practice is only a hundred years old, give or take a year or two and… you know we are not there yet. You know, Buddhism is, you know…. In Japan now we could say it’s an 1800-year-practice. So in those 1800 years yeah in 1800 years of practice they figured out a few things, and competition is one of them.
8:43

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2. Cluster: Cultural Transfer

Video 60 Question 13, Day 2, Berlin, 0843-0847

08:43
and maybe they never had competition, I don’t know.
08:47
Andi to add.

 

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2. Cluster: Cultural Transfer

Left out by Andi, please add from Cannon MVI 5135 the following: 04:54 P: “and maybe they never had competition, I don’t know.” 04:58
Video 62 Question 15, Day 2, Arizona, 1048-1415

10:48
So when I got to Russia I was told that I would have one day with people who wanted to be master candidates and at that time there were 2 or 3 Russian speaking masters and they had just be initiated but all the other masters initiating in Russia were from other countries and flew in and did classes and flew back out. And they were not able to ask for US$ 150 for first degree, they just couldn’t bring themselves to do that. So I was to address these master candidates and of course one of the big questions was about the money, US$ 10’000. So I tell you I did a lot of Reiki treatment on myself, I did a lot of nashing of teeth and I knew that I had to walk in there and say “you pay your initiating master US$ 10’000, I don’t care what they ask you, you pay it!”
12:03
So.. I went in and I was like trembling and there were 130 people in this room, wanting to be Reiki Masters. And I have to say, that was in 1992 or 3 or something like this and today I still know most of those people, like 85% and 90% of them were initiated. And they paid US$ 10’000. They got it instantly which was amazing for me because if I had addressed 130 Americans and said this to them, I would have gotten a lot of resistance. So here’s the deal:
1250-51 (räusper)
I went in and I said “you know, this system is like a recipe and I want you to know that I paid US$ 10’000 to my grandmother for my commitment to Reiki, for being a Reiki Master and at the time I had no idea why I was doing this, because I didn’t even know what that meant. And I said “over the years I’ve initiated many masters and I want you to know that whether you know it or not, you will be a Reiki Master in this system and you will be a Reiki Master in a world community and though you cannot imagine travelling outside of Russia, now, you will! And when you go outside of Russia, I want you to be the same, I want you to have the same commitment to the system, I want you to have paid the same money and I want you to be able to hold your head up and say I’m a Master of Usui Shiki Ryoho, just like you!
14:15

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2. Cluster: Mastery

Video 62 Question 15, Day 2, Arizona, 1415-1520

14;15
… They stood up and gave me a standing ovation and I nearly fell to the floor. And some years after that I was in a master seminar with a man who was there and he said “you know, you came on the eve of the USSR breaking up because that was the only way legally I could go to Russia actually. And he said “here was this giant that had been brought to it’s knees and split apart and we had no dignity left and when you said that to us you gave us back our dignity and our desire to be a Reiki Master in the world.” And he said “we never even imagined that”. And he said “you gave us something to work for”.
15;20

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2. Cluster: Mastery

Video 62 Question 15, Day 2, Arizona, 1520-1700

15;20
And it still really touches me and at the time I was there, it was like about 2000 like early 2000’s, and I had gone to Russia
1534 (räusper)
expecting to address about 300 people and that’s what the hall can take, that was how many chair it had.
1544 (sniff)
And there were over 500 people that wanted to come for this weekend. So they immediately, the organizers scrambled around, they found another place that was bigger and that I could be there but it meant that I made an amazing amount of money even though each of those 500 people paid me US$ 20 or something like that.
1608 (sniff)
And I felt a little guilty about it. You know and this man just looked at me, he said “You earned every penny of that!” He said “Don’t you feel guilty, because if you feel guilty then again you’re taking away our dignity! Because we want to support you! We want you to go out of here, you know, content and able to be nourished in whatever way you want”. And it just really touched me and the relationship that the Russian speaking countries, the former USSR countries
1654 (sniff) 
have with money is something that’s very, very special!
17:00

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2. Cluster: Mastery

Video 64 Question 17, Day 2, Arizona, 0246-0407

2:46
So.. in the sense of people squabbling about “I have the right Reiki” or “I have the only Reiki” or “I have Reiki from… you know, Krishna or whatever” you know all of this is working out the individual’s process and also it adds to this restraining and activating force on this global level what we call the .. what I call the global Reiki community. And Reiki is our reconciling force and I believe that when we are really ready to surrender to that reconciling force and are able to hold the creative dissidence that is happening right now, we are going to get something really great.
3:51
So if we can imagine ourselves in a cauldron just being stirred by the great hand of Reiki…
4:07

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2. Cluster: Cultural Transfer

Video 66 Question 19, Day 2, Arizona, 0536-0756

5:36
And then I started looking around and by that time I was in Germany, I lived in Germany for five years and I lived in Hamburg, which is very close to Berlin and I had initiated a master who lived in Berlin, West Berlin, who was going to the East to teach classes, illegally. And so the Berlin wall was very real for me and I was there when it opened. I mean “opened” is a very accurate word, because it just opened.
6:23
I thought to myself “I hope the world learns a lesson from this”. That you can put up an artificial wall but it doesn’t keep families from loving each other or wanting to be with each other, it doesn’t keep people separated. It just is an artificial structure that brings pain. And it seemed at that moment, because of the way that the wall opened that maybe we had come to another order of relationship in… between nations and between people in the world. And I have to say that after this there has been a kind of… in my opinion, a kind of back-stepping that.. and maybe it’s going forward and we’ve met another impasse. But somehow today, in 2016, you know we’re looking at countries in Europe building walls, literally building walls again, because they want to keep out their brother and sister who are starving to death, who fear for their life so much that they’re leaving their beloved homeland.
7:56

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Video 66 Question 19, Day 2, Arizona, 0756-0956

7:56
You know, it’s weird for me that people think that these people, that migratory people, people who are running for their lives literally are doing this out of choice. Well of course they would stay at home if they had food. Of course they would stay at home if they thought their children would grow up. You know, of course they would stay at home if thought that they would live to see another day. But they’re literally running for their lives and that the call to humanity for me is we’re getting an “F” right now, which in American grading system means “we’re failing”. We’re failing our test of humanity.
8:49
There is a wonderful saying that says “if you have enough build a longer table rather than a wall”. And it’s like this is what we need to do. The world needs to respond and I’m amazed that you know, an earthquake in Africa or in India or Bangladesh can just inspire all these musicians and all these people to give millions of Dollars to rebuild.. because they’re in their own place and they are not migrating. But these people, not just Syrians but other people are migrating because they have to and we’re not willing to spend this money in our own countries to take them in and to say “you can live here until your country is ready to take you back”.
9:56

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phyllis is very emotional
Video 81 Question 34, Day 3, Arizona, 0000-0211
Topic: Reconciliation, Forgiveness, Apology, Rand?

0:00
Again, this is a… my problem because I know the question isn’t going to be asked, it’s just so weird for me to just say “I’m sorry”, you know, like where does that come from and what am I sorry for and you know there is that whole thing. So I’m just trying to formulate a starting point and then where to get to from there.
0:43
Some years ago I was introduced to a little book called “The four agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz and he’s a Mexican…. He’s a Mexican … sorry I’ll start again…
1:06
Some years ago I was introduced to a little book called “The four agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz and it’s been translated into many, many languages. And basically he is asking people to start on a spiritual path having these four agreements with themselves. One is to do your best, another one is to not take things personally, to be articulate with your word and ….. okay, what’s the fourth one? Do not take things personally, do your best and be articulate with your word and … oh ja, don’t make assumptions. Okay, I’ll start again…
2:11

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She asks for forgiveness

Bei 0041 ist ein Bildschnitt .... und der folgende Para hat sie am nächsten Tag korrigiert?
RV: MVI 3020
Video 81 Question 34, Day 3, Arizona, 0211-0346

2:11
So a few years ago I was introduced in this little book called “The four agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz and I really recommend it to all of us who practice Reiki because it’s a really great way to … measure and to take assessment of our own humanness in human relationships and in the relationships with the planet and everything else as well. And I …. these four little phrases run through my mind, always do your best, don’t take it personally, do not make assumptions and be articulate with your word.
2:59
I try to do that in my own mind. And of course, being a human being, when I do my best I often don’t do what other people want or expect. When I don’t take it personally, sometimes people think that I’m cold or I don’t care. When I don’t make assumptions, it means that I don’t assume that somebody is hurt, I don’t assume that this is being taken the wrong way or I don’t assume that it actually affects people, which is actually not usually accurate (laugh).
3:46

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Video 81 Question 34, Day 3, Arizona, 0346-0537

3:46
And being articulate with my word, I think that for all of us, we try to express ourselves verbally and one of the things that is so clear for me now is that our verbal language has gaps and it definitely has places that cannot express what we really want to express. I spent some time in the 1980s and 90s learning German. It was a very interesting endeavour for me because language is not one of my better skills and though I love the German language I also didn’t have time to dedicate to the learning of it. Though I did take a 3 or 4 months course in Hamburg and that helped pave the way for more coherent German sentences (laugh)
4:45
Although I missed the week about pronouns, which turned out to be definitely significant (laugh) So I’m not very good in German pronouns. So anyway, I realized though when I was taking this language and trying to speak it that I really had to get into the mind set of German, you know and of being German. And it was really fun for me because at that point I was liv… I had an apartment in Hamburg and I really loved North Germany as a part of the country. And I was feeling very at home there. So it was easy for me to kind of slip into this German part of myself, I would call it.
5:37

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Video 81 Question 34, Day 3, Arizona, 0537-0702

5:37
But when I went to other countries and I didn’t have knowledge of their language, I didn’t really understand their culture and their cultural priorities, I realized that I often offended people or as they say here in America “was kind of like a bull in a China shop”. I just, you know, blundered my way through being an American, not really understanding that I might be offending people.
6:10
So there’s that part of me, being human. And then there’s the other part of me, which just is shy and sometimes not wanting to put myself on the firing line, which I think all of you can understand. So I have more courage these days and I also have more understanding about where other people come from, that I feel like everyone is doing their best. Everyone follows their path of Reiki and even though I may not like it or I don’t agree with it, I will fight to the death for your right to have your own path, because for me that is the gift of Reiki and the gift of this path.
7:02

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Video 81 Question 34, Day 3, Arizona, 0702-0909

7:02
And I have told my students this as well, that if we differ in opinion it’s okay for me on one hand, I may not like it, I may not like you for a few days but I will fight to the death to make sure that you’re right to disagree, or to have your own opinion more accurately. It’s preserved because that’s our inalienable right as a human being.
7:33
I also feel that, whether or not I like it, I’ve made assumptions and whether or not I like it, I not always said what I really needed to, because of my shyness or because I feel like I won’t be taken seriously. So there are many different relationships that I have that I don’t even know I have, out in the Reiki world and also relationships where I know that I’ve transgressed. And for all these times when you feel that I’ve transgressed, that I’ve entered your space unwillingly and uninvited, where I’ve offended you in some way, where my … where my loyalty to my master has caused you pain because it’s different from what you have learned is Reiki, and that has given you pain, for all these things I want to ask your forgiveness because it wasn’t my intention, it’s not the way I hold you and everyone has been a great teacher for me. And without you I wouldn’t be who I am today.
9:09

V081 Q034 D003 T0702-0909
she asks for forgiveness!
a possible end to the video?
Video 82 Question 35, Day 3, Arizona, 1045-1255

10:45
So in keeping to this feeling of doing my best at the time, I think that when I was… in the mid 1990s when I was going through this trademark thing, I had some regrets but I couldn’t have made a different decision, at the time, in 1983. I just couldn’t have, it was not to be done.
11:18
Another decision that I made, that people… that seemed to be a very big deal in the Reiki community, was in 1988 during the first Reiki Alliance conference in Europe in Friedrichsdorf. I made a very important speech. And unfortunately… I wasn’t…. I wasn’t able to be articulate and to be accurate in my word. So people misunder….. people misunderstood me, they interpreted this speech really differently and … than I had imagined they would and … I did my best. So basically this … the whole thing that it came to was that I … that I had listened with growing dismay about people saying “Well you’re the only one who has the power to initiate masters”. And I would tell them “You’re wrong. This is not about power”.
12:55

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Video 82 Question 35, Day 3, Arizona, 1255-1424

12:55
And finally what I realized was in order to dissipate this rumour, this misunderstanding, I needed to just open the doors. Because the doors were already been pride open by other masters who were initiating masters already, Barbara Weber being one of them. And people saying “Well, are they really masters? Does she have the power to initiate masters?”. And I kept saying “It’s not about that. It’s not about that!”. So… and I also, one of the other motivations for me was that I saw that some of the masters of Hawayo Takata, who had been practicing and teaching and doing their path, were really ready to initiate masters, they had master… they had students coming to them, wanting to be initiated as masters. And those students were given to me to prepare and initiate. But I was starting to get students who weren’t my students, they were the students of the masters who sent them. And I couldn’t, in all integrity, take them on. I wanted to say “You study with Paul.. you study with Beth… you study with somebody…” you know, whoever has sent them, because it just wasn’t right.
14:24

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Video 82 Question 35, Day 3, Arizona, 1424-1607

14:24
So in this speech I tried to say (laugh) that the circle of masters who had actually given me their power to initiate, like there’s a word in English called “abdicate”, they gave this power to me and I believe it was the good thing to do at that moment, 1983… ah 1982 because this would have split the Reiki community I think maybe irrevocably, if so many masters had started to initiate masters for even the first 5 years.
15:09
So I did it, everybody saw how I did it. A lot of people didn’t like what I was doing but they couldn’t say anything ‘cause they had given me and said “you are the person to initiate masters in this system”. And that would have worked, if the system had stayed small, had stayed local but it didn’t… it just… in 1988 people were being initiated all over Europe, in India, in Canada, in Australia. You know, it’s like “Really? I’m going to initiate all these masters? Forget it!”
15:47
And the other thing that I said to my friends, was “I am not going to be an initiation machine, where people just send me their students, I initiate them and that’s it. I mean that’s too weird for me. So…
16:07

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Video 82 Question 35, Day 3, Arizona, 1607-1728

16:07
I made the speech and I said “you know, it is a master’s right to share their information and their calling as a master to any student that they feel is worthy. And it is up to you to prepare yourself for this step”. And I don’t know if any of the other messages have gotten through but the response was I had given away my power, I had… and I said “I haven’t given away anything. I had nothing to give away”, because this whole power thing was a misconception, you know, it’s not about giving away your power, it’s about sharing sacred tools so that a worthy student can step on the path of mastery and have their own experience of this. It’s not a… it’s a gift but in a kind of funny way. Because you know they are going to have hardship, challenges, confrontations… it’s going to take their life and totally change it. And… that’s a kind of funny gift I have to say.
17:28

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Video 82 Question 35, Day 3, Arizona, 1728-1821

17:28
So, anyway… I spent a lot of guilty feelings around this because it was so misunderstood at the time. I felt like I hadn’t been able to really articulate what I wanted to and, you know, at some point I just had to say “I did my best and it opened up the space and it was a little ungraceful but in the end it accomplished what I wanted. And that was to dispel this idea that it was only me who had the power to initiate masters. That was really important for me. 1807… So
18:21

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Video 83 Question 36, Day 3, Arizona, 0000-0207
Topic: Forgiving yourself? - Continuation of Video 82

0:00
.. but my peacefulness around this has come and lately, what’s really funny is that I actually found my notes for this speech… as I was going through these papers… I don’t know where they… I can’t lay my hands on them today, but it was really interesting to read it and to see how progressive I was but at the same time people were not able to listen to this language. They wanted to have kind of a physical “You can initiate masters and you can not!”, you know “You are not ready!” and “You are!” and I couldn’t have done that because it really, really for me was not my place to bless anybody to initiate masters nor to prevent them from initiating masters. So of course what happened, was.. is that … the masters that I thought were ready to initiate masters were angry with me and they didn’t initiate masters for years. And the people who were kind of young, upstart masters, who ‘thought they knew everything’ and so on, they began to initiate masters right away and they soon learned what initiating masters was about. I couldn’t have taught them that.
1:33
And in the end it was really right. You know, it wasn’t something that was “pretty” in the beginning and we all had judgements. But… and I opened Pandora’s box, I admit.. but I feel like it was now a good thing. I wish I would not had used the sledge hammer but perhaps the key (laugh). But I didn’t have the key then.
2:07

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Video 83 Question 36, Day 3, Arizona, 0207-0414

2:07
Then all these new forms of practice started to pop up, some from my own students. And … people wanted me to control them. They wanted somehow from me to do a good job so that people wouldn’t feel like they could just go off and do their own Reiki. And I took it upon myself to really study the situation and decide if there was anything that I could do, anything at all. And in the midst of all this kind of contemplation time …. Shunjan Joop Hilger … I found out that he had trademarked
0301 these ähm Usui Shiki Ryo … no, 0304
the Usui System of natural healing as a phrase, Reiki as a phrase, the Kanji in Germany. And he had been awarded the trademarks. And I thought “oh… now what?”.
3:22
So in this whole process I had a partner, the Reiki Alliance, because many of their members were threatened by Joop’s use of these trademarks. And what was so, is that even though I wasn’t able at the time inside myself to trademark these things, I also didn’t feel like it was appropriate for another master outside the lineage to hold these trademarks. So we got into kind of out-of-court discussion about who own the trademarks, which cost both of us a lot of money and time and energy and … I’m sure agro… aggravation, sorry, it’s a slang (laugh).
4:14

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2. Cluster: Trademark

Video 83 Question 36, Day 3, Arizona, 1039-1303

10:39
So I just, you know, at that point between my personality and my lineage bearer self I was crushed. And I just dropped it, just like that. And I left a lot of people high and dry in my own community. Some masters actually left Reiki because of this situation. My relationship with the Reiki Alliance has never.. I don’t think healed from this particular process, on my part, because I felt not supported, not recognized and not heard….
11:37
There has been tremendous misunderstanding that has come out of this particular four year period…. And… there is nothing I can say to … convince people otherwise. You know, there is an idea that I was doing this just to make money. Well, you don’t make money on a trade mark unless the people who are able… unless the people who want to use a trademark actually pay you money. And I knew that Reiki masters wouldn’t be able to pay me US$ 5’000 a year, so that was not what I was gonna ask. It was just assumption, after assumption, after assumption, that for me, especially with the Alliance members felt very painful because I realized, they didn’t know who I was, they didn’t know how much I thought for them and they didn’t know that I could see them and that I would be compassionate. So this was just a heartbreaker.
13:03

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Video 83 Question 36, Day 3, Arizona, 1303-1520

13:03
Could I have done something different? No, I felt like I did my best. Unfortunately … (laugh) unfortunately my best was not nearly good enough. Ahhh… I was not prepared for this. I had no one in the community that would step up and be there for me. I had business men come and tell me … who were Reiki masters… come and tell me “Don’t get into this, you’ll regret it” and then walk away. They didn’t come and say “Listen, you need help. You need to know what you are getting into, I can help you with this” and eventually show me that this was not where I wanted to go. But nobody was willing to do that and that kind of unwillingness, I don’t blame them, I blame mys… I don’t blame myself, I just feel like I wasn’t open to it. And they didn’t feel the opening to come and support me.
14:05
So … I don’t know where that came from, but … It’s been my … If I have any regret in my whole time being recognized as the Grand Master, that’s the one. I never met Joop in person. I would…. Now I realize I should have several times met him in person. We only talked through attorneys. We never talked face to face. We didn’t go to court, it was settled out of court, so I didn’t even see him in court…. And I feel badly about that, because I feel like we only have the projection of who we think he or she or I was at the moment and it’s probably still present. I mean that’s where our relationship ended, so to speak. And that’s where it’s going to stay, because as human beings we can’t progress until we actually progress in real life. And that’s really sad.
15:20

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Video 83 Question 36, Day 3, Arizona, 1520-1713

15:20
So… Can I forgive myself? Well, yes. I feel like I have. Because I couldn’t go on if I hadn’t. And I don’t know what I could have done differently. And I don’t even know who to write now to say “Thank you for all that you did to support myself, your local communities and the vision of Reiki that we all had. And that vision now, where I am now, was so limited, I realised, that …. If I knew then what I know now, it would have been a very different scene, and I didn’t.”
16:24
Speaking about it helps, because I feel that I’m able to speak about it in a way that I don’t bring up my guilt and I don’t bring up feeling small and inadequate but I just bring up this overwhelming feeling of sadness that….. it couldn’t have been different. If that makes any sense. That I would have liked for it to have been different for everyone…. And it wasn’t.
17:13

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Video 83 Question 36, Day 3, Arizona, 1713-1828

17:13
Since then (laugh)… since then my life as Grand Master has been pretty mellow (laugh), and I feel that…. I changed in a way through this process and I’ve become much more clear about what I’m willing to do and what I’m not willing to do, who my audience is and who my audience is not and so on. So these are the three places when you asked me about forgiving myself that come up for me and that there’s obviously energy still there, and I think rightfully so. It’s…. these were times where in our…. in my community anyway.. in this practice that there were significant changes of development that happened.
18:28

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Video 88 Question 41, Day 3, Arizona, 0006-0117
Topic: How would you like to be remembered / your legacy?

0:06
It is my hope that my legacy will be that I not only invited the Reiki community to move to a higher expression but to have guided it so that it became a higher expression of itself. And what I mean by this, and I don’t mean to be critical of where we are because every level of expression is necessary and needs to be lived thoroughly, it’s a little bit like growing up as a human being: You know, we need to live babydump (0:46) thoroughly or it gets stuck somewhere. We need to live adolescence thoroughly, we need to live young adulthood thoroughly. And what we’re moving into as a community for me is a maturity, but it needs to what I feel like Reiki is asking of all of us is…
1:17

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Video 88 Question 41, Day 3, Arizona, 0117-0229

1:17
Is to do this reconciliation not for reconciliation’s sake but as a stepping stone to the next stage of development of this practice, and I mean practice globally. That is to be able to … develop into a practice that serves humanity and serves life. That’s very, very clear from the self-treatment of those individuals to associations and groups of people who do specific projects to the global community that actually votes and informs the government leaders of our times and that actually make a difference on a political and on a spiritual and on a mental level and the only way we can do that is to act together.
2:29

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Video 88 Question 41, Day 3, Arizona, 0801-0933

8:01
Now with all this energy moving forward, moving into the future we need to have
0811 (cough)
0814 With all this momentum and moving into the future it is clear to me that Reiki is saying “Ok, now you are ready for the big picture”. You know the world is not about Mommy and Daddy, my Reiki Master, my lineage, it’s about our Reiki and it’s about our gift to humanity. And once we have this over-arching understanding of what we have to offer the world, then we can develop our individual selves and our local communities to meet and to serve in that way…..

9:28
I’d like to be known as the person who saw that and fanned the flames.

ca 09:33

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Video 90 Question 43, Day 3, Arizona, 0829-0916

08:29
In 1992 we came together because he had had a feeling that he should step in and help me as the lineage bearer, as the Grand Master actually at that point. And I also had the same feeling. And we had not had a very friendly relationship for the last 2 years before this. So it was really reconciliation immediate that we came together and it was recognized by the Reiki Alliance as a community and so he became known as head of discipline and our office together was the office of the Grand Master. 0912 So.. (räusper) 0915
09:16

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I had asked as a last question, as an after-thought, about Paul Mitchell.
Video 90 Question 43, Day 3, Arizona, 0916-1047

09:16
So since 1992 and 3, we started this relationship until now, he’s been a peer and this particular relationship of peer has been very important for me. He’s a very different person from me, personality-wise, we have very different approaches to money, to travelling, to ….lots of different details like that, but our approach and what we are called to do in Reiki is the same. So we have had just amazing experiences working together.
10:09
He is really clear that he is not a lineage bearer, anyway now, he’s 2 years older than I am. We don’t know if his position will be filled if he dies. He is very clear that he wants my position filled by one person when I die. And I don’t know really if that’s gonna happen. I would like to think that I’m open to any.. whatever comes up, with the energy of Reiki with the Master Body and with the community.
10:47

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Video 90 Question 43, Day 3, Arizona, 1047-1151

10:47
He has played a significant role of kind of anchor in all these years and has provided either the activating force or the restraining force in our discussions and vice versa. About 10 years ago we got kind of tired of the polarisation that this was creating. So after 2 or 3 years of actually going to counselling together and trying to work out our differences, we came to this conclusion that we were just very different personalities and that we didn’t really want to change each other. His reticence to talking, his way with money, his ideas of what Reiki was and what Reiki wasn’t stimulated me to really research my own ideas and vice versa….
11:51

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Video 93 Question 46, Day 4, Arizona, 0000-0153
Topic: four agreements - correction

0:00
A few years ago I ran across a little book, it was the rage back then, called “The four agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz and I at first thought, well this is just like the precepts of Reiki and but just spoken in a different way. But then I started to realize that these four little phrases affected me in a different way, more directly maybe and with less questioning. So I’d like to share them with you because they have really made an impact in my life.
0:51
The first agreement is “Be impeccable with your word”
The second agreement is “Don’t take anything personally”
The third one is “Don’t make assumptions”
And the fourth one is “Always do your best”
I feel as a human being that I’ve been able to use these in order to not only do my best and be sure that my communication is as best as I could be, but also to own my own humanness, my own understanding of situations and then realize afterwards that my best could have been better if I had known what I know now. So…
1:53

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This entire video 93 is a "correction" Phyllis insisted on filming and it relates to Video 81 - the most important video for me! She would like the word "articulate" substituted by the word "impeccable"...
Video 93 Question 46, Day 4, Arizona, 0153-0231
Topic: correction material

1:53
I’d like to start with “Always do your best”: I feel as Reiki Masters all of us do our best in every given moment. Often times it’s easy for outsiders to say “Well, why didn’t they… why didn’t she do this or why didn’t she do that?”. But it’s easy when you’re outside of the situation to see other options. Personally I believe that you and all Reiki Masters and myself included, always do our best in any given moment.
2:31

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Video 93 Question 46, Day 4, Arizona, 0231-0347
Topic: correction material

2:31
The one about “don’t take things personally”, that’s tough. Because in the beginning, especially in the early 1990’s I thought that the changes that were happening in different practices and the formation of new forms of Reiki were an affront to Hawayo Takata and of course I wanted to defend her. And so I definitely took things personally, if not personally also for Hawayo Takata. So I was a bit strict and a bit strong in those days and really confused because at the same time I really do believe that every person has a right to their own opinion and who they are. So even though my students differ in opinion and in theory from me I want to also say that I would defend their right to have their space, have their opinion and have their theory.

3:47

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Video 93 Question 46, Day 4, Arizona, 0347-0450

3:47
When we make assumptions, often times what we are doing is filling in the gap of the unknown. And I believe that as Reiki Masters and I wanted to train myself to do this, that if there is something that I don’t know, I try not to make an assumption in order to fill in the unknown, but to just allow it to be and to see what happens. Well, of course in the early days I wasn’t very good at this and I made lots of assumptions. And now I trust that the number of assumptions that I’m making to fill in the blanks have lessened and in making those assumptions I feel like I have put other people in boxes or put on to people certain attitudes that maybe weren’t correct.
4:50

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Video 93 Question 46, Day 4, Arizona, 0450-0630
Topic: correction material; Be impeccable with word

4:50
Be impeccable with your word, this one is really important for me. I really try to be impeccable, which means to say my truth as best I can in any given moment. And the most important part of this is the “in any given moment”, because the minute that I have a conversation with somebody, that idea or that word could change (0525) (cough)
5:36
These five… these ….0540 These four agreements with myself have allowed me to look back and to…
6:05
These four agreements have allowed me to look back without judgement and without guilt and to see my humanness and to come to you with a request
0619
… and then I think it can go on with the rest of it…. (Do you think that’s possible?)
06:30

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Video 94 Question 47, Day 4, Arizona, 0000-0047
Topic: Be impeccable with word - correction

0:00
And so: be impeccable with your word, be impeccable with your word, be impeccable…. Being impeccable with my word
0:26
Being impeccable with my words
0:31
Being impeccable with my words
0:47

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sound-pieces for repair work...